Conflict
by Landraeus
Summary: A year has passed since the Battle of Crait. Kylo Ren reigns as the Supreme Leader of the First Order. His father and uncle are dead, but Ben Solo lives... and his voice haunts Kylo.


**Conflict **

Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order, paced down the corridor leading to his chambers. Those who watched saw steps made of confidence, movement fueled by purpose. Precision. They trembled.

As he slid open the door to his chambers and stepped over the threshold, Ben Solo, fallen Jedi and killer of kin, paced around his quarters. His steps were made of restlessness, movement fueled by angst. Conflict. He trembled.

It had been a year since Crait. And for a year, every moment of isolation brought Ben's mind to that fateful day and the days that led up to it.

Those pivotal days that saw the already-reigning First Order take steps toward true and total dominion by eviscerating nearly every remaining member of the Resistance, and thus choking out the last gasp of life from the First Order's only legitimate threat.

Some were even beginning to call them the New Empire.

Despite this apparent sweeping victory by the First Order, along with his claiming the throne of Supreme Leader, Ben had been left with two all-consuming emotions that were decidedly incompatible with the victory: Defeat. Conflict.

The feeling of defeat was easy enough for him to make sense of. His uncle, Luke Skywalker, had made an utter fool of Kylo in front of the entire First Order, and the surviving members of the Resistance had escaped as a result.

_She _had escaped as a result.

The conflict, however, settled around his gut like a dusty, blinding haze, incessant in its presence despite all of Kylo's efforts to swat it away.

Sparing his mother... killing Snoke... his connection to Rey. These things were all fierce gusts of wind that, when combined, created this sandstorm of confusion that swirled within him. How foolish he was to think the conflict would die with his father. Even as Kylo watched Han fall to his death, he felt the conflict amplify rather than dissipate. Snoke had been right. The deed had split his spirit.

Tiring of his anxious pacing, Kylo dropped to the foot of his bed seeking a reprieve.

He looked straight ahead and saw the battered remains of not one, but now _two_, helmets. They sat silhouetted against the backdrop of the forever-stretching black canvas of space and the bright stars painted onto it, balancing its darkness with light.

On the left was the helmet he had kept here ever since it came into his possession years ago: that of his grandfather, Darth Vader.

On the right, however, was a more recent addition. It was the tattered remains of the helmet, loathe though Kylo was to admit it, that was created to replicate the one it sat next to... or rather replicate the man who wore it. It was Kylo's helmet. Upon returning to his chambers after destroying it, Kylo found its remains laid out neatly onto his bed. He had already stormed into his quarters in a rage, furious with himself for the weakness he showed in not killing his mother, though truly he may have been more furious about the seconds following that moment of weakness, when Leia's ship, along with her life, had been (presumably) destroyed. He had since learned of her survival which sent a conflict-fueling relief coursing through him.

So, there was the smashed helmet, the evidence of a fury so fierce, it had even caused Kylo to try and attack his master, and it had brought that fury roaring back with a vengeance. At the site of the returned helmet, Kylo had grated his teeth together and ignited his lightsaber, ready to instinctively unleash his fury... but no. Snoke had called him a child. Outbursts like this only proved his point, so he shut down his lightsaber, walked over to inspect his shattered helmet, and decided to own it. Own what it represented.

So here it sat, a year later, reminding Kylo of his childish ways. He had since put those ways to death. _Let the past die._

A short buzz came from the direction of Kylo's chamber door. He gestured toward the door, causing it to slide open. Behind it stood a properly postered First Order informant who stood stiffly and looked straight ahead.

"What is it?" Said Kylo.

"P-permission to enter, Supreme Leader." Replied the informant.

"You're interrupting my meditation. Quickly." The informant stepped inside and Kylo gestured the sliding door closed.

"And what," Kylo continued, his teeth beginning to grate, the child threatening to burst out before he suppressed him. "Have I told you about how to address me?"

The informant winced. "S-so sorry, my lord. Please forgive me... my lord."

"What is it, then?" Kylo said.

The informant slowly removed his hat and kept his gaze straight, not daring to lock eyes with Kylo.

"A successful raid of a hidden Rebel base on Dantooine has been completed, my lord..."

A long pause sat in the air. It swelled with tension.

"Anything else?" Said Kylo. "That's hardly enough to justify breaking my meditation."

"Y-yes, my lord." The informant swallowed and breathed out a shaking breath. "Your mother... uh, General Organa. She... she's confirmed... to be deceased."

A fierce wind-tossed wave of emotion crashed suddenly over an unsuspecting Ben Solo. For several moments he was helplessly tossed by its unrelenting force, first over the whole of his body, then down his throat and all across his insides, drowning him. Finally surfacing from the initial shock, he found his voice, though the crashing wave began to swim across his eyes.

"She... no. No, she... I..." he felt the initial wave of emotion being churned into Kylo's most familiar emotion. Rage. Fury. He stood up, his entire body shaking. He drew and ignited his lightsaber, his teeth grating and gnashing together so forcefully, his entire head began to shake.

"I _ordered!" _He said as he began striking his lightsaber against and through any object it could reach. "_SHE BE TAKEN ALIVE!" _He reached toward the informant and slowly closed his hand, crushing the man's wind pipes.

The child could be suppressed no longer, and he came out in a force full and fierce, for he had lost his mother. He had lost the last thing in the galaxy he loved, and the pain was total.

Ben yelled as he continued crushing the life out of the informant, tears rolling freely down his face, dripping from his chin.

"She..." the informant choked out. "She..." Kylo eased his chokehold only slightly as the informants face was purpling.

"She... was... found... that... way... my lord." Just as the informant's eyes began to roll upward and hint at impending unconsciousness, Kylo released him.

"Her body. _Where is it?"_ Kylo demanded.

The informant gasped, swallowing life back into his lungs, though he quickly regained composure and stood up.

"I'm sorry, my lord. Those who discovered the body claimed... they claimed it... vanished before their eyes." He winced hard as he said this, but to his surprise, when he dared to steal a glance at Kylo, he found his face slightly softened and looking at the ground. Kylo then dropped to his knees, and pointed at his door.

"_Leave!" _He screamed, and the informant had done so before the word had been finished.

The door slid shut and Ben Solo buried his face in his hands and, despite the man he thought he had become in the last year, despite the title of Supreme Leader and despite the lies he had told himself about feeling nothing for his mother, he began to audibly weep, for he was a self-appointed orphan filled with much pain and conflict.

"Hey, kid," said a voice from the corner of Ben's chambers. A voice filled with warmth and sadness. Ben started, looked in its direction with his red weepy eyes, and had the breath ripped from him as he beheld a luminous, glowing silhouette of his uncle, Luke Skywalker. Luke began to walk to where Ben was kneeled in the center of the room and instinctively Kylo ignited his lightsaber and charged his uncle, screaming. He swung his lightsaber with all his might at Luke's glowing midsection and tumbled to the ground as it went straight through him.

Luke turned slowly and raised an eyebrow at the gasping Ben Solo, who was now on all fours.

"If... that didn't work when I was alive, wh-"

"_What do you want!" _Kylo screamed, tears continuing to force their way down his face, damn them.

"Come to haunt me?" he continued. "Come to preach about where the darkness leads? To tell me _fear leads to hate leads to anger leads to suffering? _Is that it, uncle?"

"Ben," Luke said, sighing. He walked over to him, knelt down, and placed a hand on Ben's shoulder. "I came to tell you I'm sorry," he said with a quivering voice. Ben's eyes dared to meet his uncles, and the anger was replaced with something else, with a pleading.

"I knew... her death would be hard on you. Ben, it's," Luke paused as he choked back tears. "Ben, it's hard on me, even in the state I'm in. I never loved anyone the way I loved your mother."

A silence hung as Ben considered this for a moment, before he quickly stood back up and wiped his face, resenting the vulnerable state he had allowed himself to slip into.

"It doesn't matter," said Kylo. "She's dead. My father's dead. You're dead. You're all dead. And soon..." Ben paused a moment, considering what he was about to say. "S-soon _she'll _be dead too, if she doesn't join me."

At these words, Luke's demeanor sharpened.

"Listen to yourself," said Luke. "For someone so intent on killing the past and making something new, you sure sound like a carbon copy sith with the 'join me or die' talk. Is that what you want, Ben? To be just another Emperor who never has enough power and eventually gets overthrown like all the rest?"

Ben's mind immediately went to everything he had heard about the Emperor - his power and near-invincibility. And his death. Betrayed by his apprentice. And then he thought of Snoke and all of his power. And his death. Betrayed by his apprentice.

Luke, sensing Ben's thoughts, added, "Yes. It will happen to you too. Betrayed by your apprentice when you least expect it. Search your feelings, Ben. You know it's true."

Ben looked up at his uncle. It was the same look he had given his father when Han had told him Snoke was only using him and would crush him whenever he got what he wanted. Doubt. Conflict.

"No." Said Kylo. "No, I'll be different. I'll learn from their mistakes. I'll be ready. No one will dare betray me."

Luke sighed. "I'll ask again. Is that what you want? Search, Ben. Search the deepest parts of yourself. What is it you _really_ want?"

Ben's mind went immediately back to bridge on which he had killed his father. Back to the moment when he said, with a shaking voice, 'I want to be free of this pain'. The words were true then and they were true now. He then thought of Rey. He thought of how, despite his murdering Han Solo, despite everything he had done, she had seen something in him. She never knew him before his turn, and yet she saw conflict, she saw light, and she incessantly tried to draw it out of him. This, perhaps more than anything, perpetuated the conflict in Ben. It caused a crack in the hard darkness around Kylo's heart, and through it shone light.

"What I want," Kylo said. "Is for you to leave." He began walking briskly toward his chamber door, knowing somehow that Luke would not follow him out if he left.

"Like I said, my mother is gone. My father is gone. _Ben Solo_... is gone" He slid open the door.

"You want to know," Luke said, before Kylo stepped out, "What the last thing I ever said to your mother was?"

Ben considered this, but he had shown enough weakness already. The conflict was still present, he couldn't deny it, but he wouldn't indulge it any further, so he walked out and slid the door shut before he could hear Luke speak another word.

"No one's ever really gone," said a voice from inside the closed chamber. But it wasn't Luke's. He glanced down and smiled. Standing next to him, in all of her splendor and radiance and luminous beauty, was Leia.

**Epilogue**

Kylo walked down the corridor outside his chambers, trying to clear his mind of all the conflicting thoughts that warred inside of it. His steps were halted as all the air in the corridor seemed to be sucked out and he felt something he hadn't felt in over a year. Something he thought permanently severed that day on Crait. He swiveled his head in every direction, looking, but saw nothing. Slowly, he began to walk again, and as he approached an intersection with another corridor, he looked to his right and started. Not three feet from him, there she was.

Rey was breathing deep and heavy breaths, her heart pounding up against her chest, tears stained on her face. She looked up at Ben through red grief-stricken eyes. He returned her gaze and for several moments they each just held it there, neither quite sure what to say, or feel.

"I... felt," Rey said before having to pause to compose herself and swallow her sobs. "I felt her pass." She brought her hand up to her mouth before bringing it back down, taking a breath, and truly composing herself. "I'm sorry, Ben. I'm so sorry."

Ben opened his mouth, knowing he should say something, but he couldn't find words for this moment. This inexplicable moment.

"The last thing she told me," Rey continued. "She said... 'There's still good in him, Rey. There's still good in him'.

This, even more than the visit and words from his uncle, opened the crack in the Darkness a little wider, and it was this crack that led him to ask,

"And what did you say?"

Rey stared deep into Kylo's seeking eyes, and she spoke light into the conflict.

"I know." She said, and then she disappeared.


End file.
